Silent Pain
by Nemisses
Summary: Ziva doesn't complain but the torture did leave it's marks.


Based on that little tidbit we saw in Code of Conduct. Ziva stretching her fingers after knocking on that man's door. I am by no means a doctor so don't get all medical on me. I didn't.

**Silent Pain**

Tony had noticed that Ziva kept touching her fingers. She was constantly opening and closing them.

"Something wrong"

"nope"

He wasn't going to get anything out of her. So he just let it go and didn't think anything of it until she announced that she was going down to see Ducky. She left her desk and was heading for the elevator. Gibbs didn't say anything but he could tell from the look on Tony's face something was up.

"What's wrong"

"Nothing Boss, it's just…"

Tony shook his head no… he was reading too much into it but Gibbs wasn't about to let it go just like that.

"Something bothering you"

Gibbs had gotten up and was walking over to Tony's desk

"Well this morning when she drove us to the crime scene, well Boss she drove normal ! She wasn't crossing any speed limits, no sudden moves or turns. The other cars weren't blasting their horns, she was actually driving carefully."

Gibbs had noticed it to. He just thought she was trying to make a good impression but apparently Tony saw it differently.

"In her case Boss, that kind of driving isn't normal. Something's wrong. Back me up here, McGee."

McGee nodded. He agreed with Tony. Ziva's driving this morning was not normal. She drove like everyone else and in Ziva's case that wasn't normal. As a matter of fact he hadn't even gotten sick.

"Something is different"

His team was right. Ziva's driving this morning wasn't normal because she drove normal. Did that make any sense, Gibbs shook his head. He was going to ask his new Probie what was the matter based on the fact she was driving like anyone else.

Gibbs entered the morgue and was met by the sight of Ziva sitting on one of the tables with her back towards him and her right foot on Ducky's lap. Ducky was just about finished with him taping her foot. They hadn't noticed him entering the morgue.

"I told you my dear, you should take of your shoes whenever it's possible. Your feet haven't completely healed and you are thinking about running the marathon"

" I am not about to run a marathon Ducky. I just want to keep up with Tony and McGee that is all. I am as Tony calls it a Probie now. Do you know what would happen if I told them I cannot go with them due to the fact that my feet have to get used to my new shoes again."

"You were tortured my dear. They would understand. Now let me see your hands. You told me your right hand was hurting"

Gibbs didn't move. He knew she had been tortured but she never once complained about being in pain, not once. He had been a fool, just because she didn't open up didn't mean she wasn't having any side effects from the torture. Dammit he thought he should have kept a eye on her.

Gibbs felt he should make his presence know. He cleared his throat. Ziva and Ducky were both surprised by his presence. Ziva tried to get her boot back on but failed miserably and it fell to the ground. Gibbs picked it up, grabbed a crutch and took Ziva's right foot in his hand. Gibbs took a good look at her foot. It was completely taped in so it would give her as much strength as possible. He took the sock Ziva was still holding in her hand and put it on her right foot. He picked up the boot and gave it to her.

"Do you wanna do it or can I"

Ziva shook her head and took the boot out of his hands.

"I'll do it, be less painful if I do it myself"

"What else are you hiding from us"

"I am not hiding anything from you. I just don't want you pity." Ziva grimaced when she placed the boot on her foot. It was hurting her just putting on her boot. Gibbs was beginning to get mad, really mad.

"Goddammit Ziver, you were tortured. It's not pity we are showing it's real concern for your well being. The guys upstairs are wondering why you driving isn't back to normal. They were missing the near death experience this morning"

Ziva started to withdraw. Ducky could tell. She was getting that blank look again. She was retreating back into her own world. He grabbed Gibbs' arm and gently took over the conversation.

"What Jethro is trying to say Ziva. We need to know so we can anticipate it, we need to know what hurts and what doesn't. We know that you were declared fit for fieldwork but that doesn't mean you are without pain. If we can in anyway reduce that pain we need to know the extent of it."

Ziva sighed. She knew they were right. She had to tell them some things not everything but some.

"OK"

"Let's hear it" Gibbs had gotten over his outburst.

"my feet hurt if I walk to much on them but that can also be because I bought new boots"

Gibbs stared at her. He was giving her the famous Gibbs' look. Ziva crumbled.

"Ok, they hurt no matter what boots or shoes I wear."

"what else" Gibbs wasn't about to let her off that easily.

"My fingers constantly hurt, no matter what. When I get tired I get a headache and sometimes a fever. I throw up a lot but then again I do take a lot of medication against viruses, bacterial infections and …………STD's"

The last word was whispered but they all heard it. Both Gibbs and Ducky didn't know what to say.

"According to my doctor I have to be patient , that it will take time"

Gibbs' sat down on the crutch.

"Is that why you refuse any lunch invites from the guys and Abby"

Ziva nodded.

"What if I need to throw up. That would be embarrassing. It's already getting better but I don't want to take the risk. My stomach just has to get used to food again. I didn't get much to eat back……there"

"Alright, we don't need to tell them everything but they are worried about you. Your driving tipped them of, it wasn't your normal every day death experience like they have gotten used to."

Gibbs' and Ziva got back into the bullpen. Gibbs took one look at his team and directed them into the elevator. As soon as it started to descent he flipped the switch.

"Ziva and I had a talk and we decided that it's best you all know why Ziva does certain things and why not"

Ziva took a deep breath and told them, she told them about her feet, her fingers and hands. She told them about not being able to hold her food sometimes. She clearly heard Tony take a deep breath and letting out a big sigh of relief.

She looked up to see his eyes clearly confused with his behavior.

"What"

"Thank god, I thought you had turned into Jardine with her excessive cleanliness. I thought it was a reaction to that filthy hole they kept you in and that that was the reason you wouldn't go out to lunch with us. I kept showering until I turned into a prune every morning."

He laughed. "Don't be afraid. You can always go out to lunch with us even when you do have to throw up cause you know what I've got your back"

**The End.**

Tony's got her back, he always got her back. I am going to love reviews so push that button and express yourself. Please….nope I am not going to beg. Ok maybe just a little.


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